I’m swimming in unfamiliar waters here with no life vest. And if he’s not gay, I worry I could seriously damage our relationship and hurt his pride by suggesting he is. He’s a sensitive kid, and I worry he’d lie or resent me. But if my son were gay, I would have a different, stricter set of rules regarding male friends. Gomer is a nice kid, and I’ve met his parents. I have no specific knowledge that anything has happened between them. But a friendship with a guy isn’t sexual… unless it is. I’ve had the (straight) sex talk with my son, and he knows that I don’t want him to be sexually active yet. If Gomer were a girl, these things wouldn’t be allowed.
Sometimes they’re here when I’m not, and often they’re alone together with the door closed. My son has a friend, let’s call him “Gomer”, who comes over often. And, truly, if my son is gay, while I won’t pretend it’d be no big deal and not require a bit of mental adjustment, I’d love him and support him fully.
I have no problem with gay people and I support full equality for same-sex couples. I’ve found gay porn on his laptop (yes, I snoop I pay the bill and I’m his dad) he’s shown zero interest in girls and he has always been a tad effeminate, though I know that’s probably an unfair stereotype. Over the past year, however, I have become increasingly convinced that he is gay. Our relationship isn’t perfect-I work a lot and he’s a teenager, but no major issues. Overall, he’s a good kid: gets decent grades, rarely gets in trouble. I’ve raised him on my own, basically, since birth, with help from some good friends and nearby family. I’m a 37-year-old single father with a 14-year-old son.